Skip to main content

Hope activates love



"Hope is the thing with feathers - That perches in the soul - And sings the tune without the words - And never stops - at all" -Emily Dickinson 





Here is my brand new, fresh, free blog! First post, hot off the press! My website subscription ended, along with my attempt to start a coaching business, and I am feeling the desire to get back to my roots, and create an old school blog. Like when I first started blogging in 2005.
More accessible, less precious.

For posting my pictures and just for writing - because write I must! It doesn't matter to me how many people read what I write, or if I ever publish a book (though I plan to), but write I must!

  I am craving simplicity, with every fiber of my being. 

The simple, country life is calling me. I want to dig my toes into the earth, ride horses, jump in a cold lake, drive an old beater car, and move more closely with the rising and setting rhythms of the sun. Make art, write. Sit quietly in nature and watch the muskrat making its way from one shore to another.

  I want to surrender to what truly nourishes my soul.

 I have been home for a month now, in the small town that I grew up in - the one I vowed I would never return to live in! Every day I wake up and I am astonished to realize that I am so deeply happy to be here, and that I can actually picture myself building a life here. I've traveled all over the world, and lived an urban life style for the past fourteen years, and now I am feeling the pull back to my roots; to the loon call, the berries ripening in the sunshine, and the people that know your face when you walk down the street.

 I've realized that we will change when we are ready to change. We will return, discover, awaken, learn, unravel... when we're ready, and not before. No matter how much we try to plan, control, or force the change we so desperately want to happen.

When I walk around the lake, it smells like my childhood. I pass the little beach where I learned how to swim- complete with the saskatoon bushes, weeds, and leeches. We brought a salt shaker to the beach to help us remove the leeches from our legs after star fish floating on our bellies.

 I feel the home that is always within me.

This hope that I am feeling is not based on optimal circumstances. I am broke (again!), I am still separated and single. I am still trying to figure out how to build the life that I want and make an income doing so.

 But underneath all this, there is  a deep sense of  peace. Everything is going to work out. Everything is working out. And this hope activates love - the only thing that matters. I am reading Brene Brown's book'Daring Greatly', in it she talks about the opposite of lack and scarcity not being abundance, but enough.

 This is enough. I am enough.

 Right now, in my life, this is enough. I am enough. My circumstances will change, they always do, as my story unfolds organically. But right now - this is enough. I am enough. I am well. And 'hope is the thing with feathers - that perches in the soul.'

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Raw Beauty of Life

"You are like a leaf blowing around in the eye of a hurricane. Life has really landed on you. It's amazing to see how you carry it." -Ryan Hartley Life is like a dark night, and a star-lit soul peering into a jar of fireflies. We are free and bound at the same time.  It is the collected moments that you are present to, which create a beautiful life.  Observing the steam rise in curls from a mug of green tea, the pattern of sunlight streaming through a leaf, the warmth of someones lips on yours, the crinkle at the corner of the eyelids in a child's smile, the moment you jump into a cold lake.  This is life.  And yes - the moments where you are curled up in a ball on the floor, your body heaving with sobs. The moments where you are called out. The dark parts of yourself that you encounter, and choose to integrate. The times you see someone doing something you wish you were doing and feel jealous. Life is not a tea party that we dress up f...
2 comments
Read more

Blessed Be

( Francesca Woodman- Then at one point _Providence, Rhode Island 1978) Bless the quiet mornings when no one is up and I am alone. Bless the still, tall trees outside my window. Bless the bright stars in the night sky. Bless the stillness. Bless the pile of dishes, and bless my lover, who will do the dishes today. Bless the way he will pile them haphazardly and precariously to dry, and not dry, on and off the rack. Bless the used green tea bags, and the red polka dot bowl with remnants of cottage cheese in it. Bless the empty bottle of wine. Bless the half full bottle of wine. Bless the Netflix documentaries. Bless the exhaustion. Bless the warmth of two bodies sleeping beside each other. Bless the waking up from a good dream. Bless the surge of tenderness you feel for another human being. Bless the kisses. Bless the quiet before a day full of talk and doing. Bless the quiet after a day full of talk and doing. Bless the pile of poetry books. Bless the Marim...
Post a Comment
Read more

What I've learned from a year of tarot

“Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books that are now written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. The point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.” ―  Rainer Maria Rilke        I've just completed my 2018 forecast tarot reading, and I wanted to reflect on all that I have learned from the tarot this past year.  Life is so much more complex than we allow it to be, and I have learned to step into the middle of paradox. True, alchemical treasure is found when we step outside the camps of 'black' and 'white', into Rumi's field, out beyond right and wrong. And this is the place we need to be, now more than ever, in the midst of all the polarities and 'sides' runni...
Post a Comment
Read more